Taishakuten's Mad Ramblings
by little Alex
Summary: Taishakuten's rambles madly at night? Slash.


Disclaimer: They don't belong to me, but to Clamp, whom I admire without ends and won't even dream of ripping off.

Ratings: R, perhaps?

Archive: Yes, please

Feedback: Craved as if I'm the worst junkie

Author's Notes: This contains major spoilers for RG Veda. In fact, it contains _the_ spoiler for the series. But I always had a thing for Taishakuten, despite his being the biggest, baddest villain in all of history. Most of the conversations I took directly out of the book, the rest are my own.

*****

Lightly, as to not wake my sleeping lover, my hand travels with its own will to caress his face his straight eyebrows, his nose, his closed eyes, his pointed ears, and the raw silk of his hair. I kiss him on his cheek, but my lips only meet air. The room shimmers, and I realize I am in my throne room amongst my subjects and, again, only dreaming about Ashura-oh the late ruler of the Ashura clan. I glance at the cowed people around my throne and yet I have only one thought in my mind.

I hate him, more than I can ever hope to bear.

When I first laid eyes on him, I knew he was the most beautiful being I would ever meet. The raven black hair and eyebrows, the golden eyes, the straight and narrow nose, and the small mouth converged on his triangular face into a dangerously irresistible design. Mark the word design, reader, for nothing by nature can be so exquisite. Beautiful but remote, even cold, he would always look like a perfectly crafted masterpiece with the finest alabaster, by the hand of the greatest sculptor. I was a mere captain then, ambitious, but common born. He and Tentai, the Emperor of Heaven, were reviewing the troops and I happened to look up. That sealed my Fate. I knew without a doubt then that I had to have him. Despite my hatred of the unavoidable gossip about the nobility, I learned from it everything I could about him.

I was told that he had only a few selected friends and exuded aloof politeness to all others. Not even Tentai was counted among his friends -- being the very intelligent man that our emperor was, Tentai never realized -- though he was loyal to the undeserving man without question. I began to devise plans to capture his attentions. If I accomplished some great feat, surely then he would notice me? Before, I would probably be content to be merely competent, to rise up to only the rank of general. He gave me the reason to be ruthless. For him, I would do anything.

I did not meet him again, however, until the second time Tentai granted me an audience. Naive in matters of friendship, the man was surprisingly much shrewder when it came to matters of state. During his first audience with me, he had awarded me the noble rank of Raijin so that he could ask me to accomplish a supposedly impossible task: to defeat the demons in the Eastern parts. How ingenious. I had returned triumphant, however, all for my beautiful Ashura-oh. So of course Tentai had to grant me a second audience to commend me.

Through the period of time where everyone exchanged silly pleasantries, my object of desire remained a statue. In anger, I asked for and received our first sword fight. The best warrior in the heavens, he knew then he finally met his equal. He greatly honored me by using the sacred sword of the Ashura clan, the Shurato, and I gladly told him so. Shockingly to all in Court, but certainly not the two of us, the fight ended in a draw. Then, accompanied by his Twelve Exalted Knights -- Twelve Idiotic Knights was more like it --who served as his bodyguards, he began to leave the throne room.

I halted his actions by merely standing in his path. "Whatever I want, I get. Please remember so, Ashura-oh."

His Knights' hands all moved onto the hilts of their swords. He motioned them to stop and raised one perfect eyebrow at me. He smiled and, his Knights following like puppies, walked back to his castle without another glance at yours truly.

From that point in time, I attended all the court events despite my disdain of all the lazy nobles and court intrigues, hoping for the rare chance that he would be there also. Once in two or three months, when the guest of honor was one of his friends, he would attend, small but radiant smiles for all his friends, detached courtesy for all others. Guess which category I fell into. Whenever he was tired of the crowd, he would stroll into the gardens, and I would follow, pretending, when we ran into each other, that it was all a coincidence. We would then chat about non-essentials, the weather, and maybe the demons still in the North. Afterward, we would walk back into the palace together, my heart dancing joyfully for even those brief moments.

At the fifth of such parties, he confronted me. He had gone into the gardens minutes earlier, and I was dutifully following when I finally saw him. He was only yards ahead of me, and I schooled my face into an expression of surprise. I was about to go up, maybe tap his shoulder, when he turned around and smiled. I shuddered. The smile was so predatory that it could have been one of mine.

His voice was deceptively soft. "The way you keep sneaking up on me, Taishakuten; one with more paranoia would think that you're trying to--"

"I assure you, Ashura-oh, it was a mere coincidence that we meet again in this beautiful, indeed, very beautiful garden." I smiled, hopefully projecting calmness.

"As they say, once is chance, twice is coincidence, but three times is conspiracy." His smile never wavered. If I had truly meant him harm-- Inwardly I cringed. "This must be at least the fourth time we've," he said, cocking his head, "ran into each other at this exact spot."

"The fifth, actually."

"Ah, is it? Well, then, I'm sure you can give me an excellent explanation."

"I only worry about the safety of our best warrior lord." I glanced around the apparently quite peaceful garden. "These trees make a very easy hiding place for assassins, after all."

He nodded. "Thank you for your," he said, narrowing his eyes so very slightly that I almost did not notice, "concern. I'm returning into the ball room. Care to join me?"

"Of course." Did I say it just a bit too eagerly?

He smiled again, this time mixed with a knowing look of something between sympathy and pity. Damn, he knew. "After you, Taishakuten."

We thusly entered into a pattern of acquaintance -- not friendship; _that_ I could never earn -- and I was almost satisfied. He allowed my presence near him and condescended enough to converse with me. I then learned of another piece of gossip that proved to be true. He had used numerous men and women as temporary bed partners and dropped them just as quickly. All of them still could not help but feel grateful for the brief moments that he had spent with them. To capture and hold his attentions, I would have to do something much more drastic. Then the opportunity presented itself and I grasped it gladly.

One night right after another party, I emerged from it disappointed. He was not there, despite words of the contrary. I walked down the grand staircase, cursing the foolish gossips, and then there he was, almost marching toward my direction. His gaze was on the marble floor and he presumably did not see me until we were only a few feet apart.

He called my name, "Taishakuten..."

"Are you going back already, Ashura-oh?" I asked, and he shrugged. "You go out without even a guard. Maybe somewhere was hiding an assassin?" Again, words about his safety. If I could only speak my true thoughts...

He furrowed his eyebrows and then his face again cleared into a mask of serenity. "Taishakuten. Do you think--" He blinked. "Is so-called Fate unchangeable?"

My eyes widened, then I almost sneered. "If it was for something I want, I will change even the positions of the stars!"

"Then," he said, closing his eyes, and nodded. "Are you willing to help me change the tracks of the stars?"

I trembled, ever so slightly, but a true smile graced my lips. I softened my tone. "If I help you, will I get what I desire?"

"What do you desire?" His eyes were so guarded...

I allowed my hand to touch his hair, the waterfall of black silk, and ran strands of it between my thumb and my index finger. "You!"

Unexpectedly, he started, his eyes full of shock. Did he truly not know? Then he again dropped his gaze to the floor. "If we can indeed change Fate--" He looked up again, smiled, and turned around to stride back to his castle.

I stood there, not knowing what to do, until my brain whispered, _Idiot, go catch up!_ I ran up to him as he slowed his pace. He waited until I was beside him, then quickened his steps again. He led us directly into his bedchambers without a word.

It was a beautiful ro-- it was beautiful, but not a room. It was more of a large stone gazebo: no walls, only thick pillars and low railings extending into seats. The dome-like ceiling was made with some transparent material that let the stars shone onto us. I was about to say something as sentimental as, oh, "I cannot live without you," or some such foolishness when he expertly kissed me. I was the one who broke away to look at the sea. It was not literally a sea, just a substance that looked like water. Tentai's castle-palace stood in the middle of the vast ocean, an identical twin to this castle.

He then explained why he needed my help and my heart shattered into a thousand pieces. For his son, his future heir, he was doing this: sleeping with an upstart he most assuredly despise. Three hundred years into the future, the yet unborn child and five others will join together and transform into the six stars. The six stars will then breed a fire that will destroy all evils in the world and, with that, the world itself. I was to stop this at all costs. How?

I turned over the information in my mind and murmured, "The next lord of the Ashura clan will be the destroyer of all, true?"

He took the question seriously. "Yes. The Star-Seer has never prophesied wrongly." His fingertips touched his forehead. "I feel like I'm committing a sin..."

I looked back over my shoulder at him.

"...the sin of rebelling against the heavens and attempting to change Fate." His eyes went glassy. "If Fate can't be changed, then the world will become hell because of me." He closed his eyes as I come closer and stroked his hair again. "And yet, even then, I still want my son, the next Ashura lord, to be born."

I kissed the silken strands in my hand. "If that is your wish, then I promise you: no matter how much blood is shed, no matter whom will be damned into hell, I will honor our agreement. I won't let your son, who _will_ be born, to become the god of destruction."

He paused and looked up in a smile. "I saw the future lord of the Yasha clan."

"Is he the one destined to wake your son three hundred years later?"

He nodded. "He's still a youth, and with beautiful eyes."

I knelt on the bed, tipped his face, and kissed him again. "Then, for you, I will become the emperor, to control all in this world, to monitor the joining of these six stars, and to stop the prophecy from happening."

He smiled listlessly and returned the kiss with little enthusiasm but great expertise. Drawn into his embrace, we stripped efficiently. With skills befitting a courtesan, he brought my body to heights never achieved. Yet my heart was descending into enough pain to drive me mad. I was willing to abandon all I had ever believed in: my honor, my pride, my principles; and he considered this no more than a trade agreement. Perversely, the more pain my heart suffered, the higher was my pleasure, until I could contain it no more. I climaxed into his pliant body, liquid fire of ecstasy coursing through my veins. I withdrew from him and tried to draw him into my arms.

He shrugged off the embrace and turned to face me in the blandest smile. "I'm sorry, but I sleep best alone. I hope you don't mind--"

My temper got the better of me and I snarled my words. "Damn it, this won't be the last time--"

His eyes glinted coldly, but the smile remained. "Of course not. You can stay if you want and come back whenever you wish. I'm," he said, narrowing his eyes, "yours to command."

I stared at him, just stared. It was never your sin, Ashura-oh; it was mine, to carry even the slightest trace of feelings for you. How could you give me heaven and hell in the same embrace! I kissed him again, this time as brutally as I could. "You like being a whore, huh? Then I'll treat you like one!" I took him again, slamming into him without care, and, heavens help me, he _liked_ it. Clutching onto me like he was holding on for dear life itself, he moaned, whimpered, and let out little cries of both pain and ecstasy. Exhausted, I climaxed again into his body. I collapsed onto him and, to my shock, into sobs: just his name, over and over again. He gathered me into his arms, stroked _my_ hair, and kissed my forehead. Surprised, I looked up into his eyes and I was once again alive with hope. In there were compassion, desire, and, dare I chance it, love.

He gently kissed the tears away. "Yes, I do lo--" He pressed his lips together.

"I know; I understand." I smiled bitterly. To become the new emperor, I had to wage a war and kill the current one and his majesty's loyal subjects, which naturally included Ashura-oh.

"Good. Then the rest of tonight never happened." His eyes burned with love, but they carried a hint of steel.

I closed my eyes and nodded. I might get the chance to have his body again, but his heart would be closed from now on. Better make the best of tonight. I opened my eyes and kissed him again. Never had I offered this to anyone else, but for him? Anything. I whispered, "Ashura-oh, I want you to...take me." His golden eyes widened with surprise and I smiled coyly. "Hopefully with more, uh, gentleness than I've just shown you."

He took a breath, exhaled slowly, and returned a shakier smile. Then he proceeded to fulfill my wish to my heart's content.

*****

The last time I saw him was one year later, on the battlefield. I told him that he and Tentai were the only ones left in the castle. He closed his eyes for a brief moment, internal pain evident on his face. When he opened his eyes again, he was again the fiercest warrior. We fought and I saw his true powers for the first time. If unleashed, as it will be if the unborn child become the dark star, it will undoubtedly destroy the world. No wonder even Ashura-oh was afraid.

"Kill me and consume my body." The command shocked me into inaction. "If you indeed cannot change the courses of the stars, then, before my son transforms into the god of destruction, kill him for me." He blinked away the invisible tears. "Therefore, you need _power_." And so, we fought again and I stabbed him with my lance. The last words were a whisper. "Everything of mine now belongs to you." He died on my shoulder. I obeyed and ate his body, gaining his power and, in the middle of my forehead, my third eye, the mark of gravest damnation.

And for the next three hundred years, I have lived only for my promise.

Oh, Ashura-oh, what have we done! The people live in eternal fear and the lords no better. The world already resembles hell; maybe it will matter naught whether your son awakens! Maybe a fire to consume everything _is_ a good idea. Does anyone even care anymore? Well, maybe they still do, but I certainly do not. Oh, my dearest, it is _your_ sin; why do I have to carry the burden of your guilt? You became the exalted martyr and I the hated new Tentai. Then again, do I truly care? To live alone, in a world without the presence of one's most beloved, is the most painful destiny. For three hundred years, my soul has been desolate. Three hundred years! I yearn for the day I can fulfill my promise and die. Death will not be my enemy, but my salvation. For this horrific semblance of life you have condemned me to, I hate you. And for as long as I live, I will always love you.

I glance back at the general reporting in front of my throne. Hmm, what is this I hear? The Star-Seer has escaped her prison? How interesting. She is, after all, the one who conferred upon Ashura-oh the Fate of his son. Ah, well, I guess I must find some way to deal with this. "Yasha-oh?"

~~finis~~


End file.
